Stereoscopic view of canoeists in the Adirondacks, ca. 1880. Source: Wikimedia
I was given a short critique of my first five pages by editor Jeni Chappelle. She "thoroughly enjoyed reading it. It reads like a novel of the time does. Not all historical fiction does that, and I like it." (thank you Jeni!)
However, she warned me about 'head-hopping' too much. (to be fair so did my editor in England, I just didn't listen). This is when the author changes point of view from one character to the next within the same scene.
I started to look through my document more closely and found a few places where I do this often.
Quite frankly, it is an easy pattern to fall into when writing in third person. To be omnipresent. To play god to your characters. Assume you know everything everyone was thinking and just tell the reader instead of show the reader.
I think there are times when this is necessary, however the trick is not to over-do it.
The most difficult point of view for me to write was William Durant's character.
What was he thinking exactly, spending so many years building his camp Pine Knot? Why was he such a perfectionist? Where did he get his training to understand architecture? Who or what influenced him?
These are all answers I had to piece together before I could delve into his character in the story. In fact, during my first draft, my editor told me William came off as very wooden. I have tried to make him more human.
But to do that I had to have him interact with his family members in a way that would ultimately show his true character. His relationship with his father Dr. Thomas C. Durant is a good example.
In court testimony of the lawsuit brought by William's sister Ella for her share of the inheritance, William expounds on his relationship with Dr. Durant. He relates that his father was an autocrat. He states his father often left him ignorant of many business interactions when William was the President of the Adirondack Railroad Company. Dr. Durant had a stranglehold on the family finances.
Dr. Durant left no will. But when he died the company was besieged by debt and creditors were waiting like wolves at the door.
Being brought up in a big family, I believe that what shapes people's character is their family interactions. Indeed, family is the first place one learns about love, caring, jealousy, and all the other emotions that come with human connection.
It is challenging though to try to keep all of these emotions straight when you have four family members in the same room. Talking, thinking, despairing, cajoling and any of the other myriad of things families do together. As they do in my first scene. It will be posted on Boxing Day. Stay tuned.
However, she warned me about 'head-hopping' too much. (to be fair so did my editor in England, I just didn't listen). This is when the author changes point of view from one character to the next within the same scene.
I started to look through my document more closely and found a few places where I do this often.
Quite frankly, it is an easy pattern to fall into when writing in third person. To be omnipresent. To play god to your characters. Assume you know everything everyone was thinking and just tell the reader instead of show the reader.
I think there are times when this is necessary, however the trick is not to over-do it.
The most difficult point of view for me to write was William Durant's character.
What was he thinking exactly, spending so many years building his camp Pine Knot? Why was he such a perfectionist? Where did he get his training to understand architecture? Who or what influenced him?
These are all answers I had to piece together before I could delve into his character in the story. In fact, during my first draft, my editor told me William came off as very wooden. I have tried to make him more human.
But to do that I had to have him interact with his family members in a way that would ultimately show his true character. His relationship with his father Dr. Thomas C. Durant is a good example.
In court testimony of the lawsuit brought by William's sister Ella for her share of the inheritance, William expounds on his relationship with Dr. Durant. He relates that his father was an autocrat. He states his father often left him ignorant of many business interactions when William was the President of the Adirondack Railroad Company. Dr. Durant had a stranglehold on the family finances.
Dr. Durant left no will. But when he died the company was besieged by debt and creditors were waiting like wolves at the door.
Being brought up in a big family, I believe that what shapes people's character is their family interactions. Indeed, family is the first place one learns about love, caring, jealousy, and all the other emotions that come with human connection.
It is challenging though to try to keep all of these emotions straight when you have four family members in the same room. Talking, thinking, despairing, cajoling and any of the other myriad of things families do together. As they do in my first scene. It will be posted on Boxing Day. Stay tuned.
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